The following is an excerpt from, “Throw off Pornography”, the 4th book in the “Lord of My Life” series. You can download the complete book for free through Amazon Kindle, Apple Books or Barnes & Noble. You can also order the paperback version through the Amazon bookstore. Find direct links for all of these at ktfproductions.com under the store tab. Visit every week and receive weekly excerpts January through April of 2024.
GOING ALL IN
So, are you ready to being your journey towards recovery? Are you sure? Before taking your first steps toward freedom, you should probably ask yourself an important question, “do I really want to be free?” The path to freedom can be a fairly long and difficult road, and if your whole heart isn’t in it at the outset, you will eventually fail. Sure, the Holy Spirit can help you, but he likely won’t do it for you. Over the years I’d made several attempts. Sometimes I’d string together several days of freedom from porn. Sometimes several weeks. At my best, I might string together a few months, but they all ultimately ended in failure. To succeed, you can’t go at this half-heartedly. You can’t go into this thinking you’ll eventually fail. You have to go “all in”. You have to be desperate for success. If you watched the third movie in the Batman Dark Knight trilogy, “The Dark Knight Rises,” you may remember the scene where Bruce Wayne finds himself in a dungeon prison. To escape, he had to climb a very high stone wall, then make a difficult jump to freedom. His first two attempts ended in failure. Why? Because he tied a rope around himself in case he were to fall. It wasn’t until he attempted the climb without the rope, when he decided it was do or die, did he succeed. If you attempt this with a preverbal rope tied around your waist in case you fail, you likely will fail. The best way to succeed is to go all in, to purpose in your heart that you are ready to throw off pornography once and for all.
Do you remember the story of Elisha and Elijah from the Old Testament? When God told the prophet Elijah to anoint Elisha to be his successor, Elijah obeyed. He found Elisha plowing in a field. He went out to him and put his cloak around him indicating that he’d be the next prophet. In that moment, Elisha accepted the task wholeheartedly. He was “all in”, completely abandoning his former way of life. It says in 1 Kings, chapter 19, verse 21:
So Elisha left him and went back. He took his yoke of oxen and slaughtered them. He burned the plowing equipment to cook the meat and gave it to the people, and they ate. Then he set out to follow Elijah and became his servant.
When Elisha committed to his decision there was no turning back. He killed his oxen and burned his plow. He washed his hands of his old life in favor of his new one. He obeyed God and scripture records that God granted him a double portion of the Spirit that was given to Elijah. Are you ready to go “all in”? Are you ready to turn away from your life of habitual sin in favor of freedom in Christ? Are you desperate to be free? This might be a good time to calculate the cost of burning the security blanket of pornography and masturbation once and for all.
One stumbling block that can keep us from deciding to go “all in” is when we consciously or subconsciously minimize the eternal weight of the sin of pornography. It is easy to convince ourselves that pornography and masturbation isn’t that bad because it is a “functional” sin - one that will not outwardly affect the way we live, or the way we are viewed by our friends, peers and loved ones because it is hidden. We might make the mistake of comparing it to more outwardly noticeable addictions like alcohol or gambling which can cause the kind of damage others can see. Going to work drunk can lead to the loss of a job. Driving drunk can lead to jail time. Gambling can lead to poverty or broken trust. But pornography can remain hidden for decades, seemingly with no consequence. We can still do our jobs, love our families, have friends, obey the law, and avoid direct calamity. But remember, in the sight of God all sin is disobedience. 1 John, chapter 3, verse 4 reminds us:
Everyone who sins breaks the law; in fact, sin is lawlessness.
So, it can be argued, that in the sight of God sinning with pornography carries the same weight as murdering someone. Both are breaking God’s law, both are sinning against him, and both carry with them the sentence of death because Paul reminds us in Romans, chapter 6, verse 23:
For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.
If not for the blood of Jesus, every sin, even pornography, leads to death. Remember that Jesus said, “anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” So, in truth, viewing and masturbating to pornography is equal to adultery. And the sin of adultery is listed among the 10 Commandments! Yes, porn is a sin that hinders and entangles, but it is also a sin that deserves death. Pornography is serious. Jesus paid the death penalty on the cross because of this and all forms of sin. So, we need to take it as seriously as he does.
And finally, it would help our struggle if we drill down to what obedience really looks like. Though they are two sides of the same coin, trying to avoid doing something bad is very different than trying to proactively do something good. Avoiding pornography, for instance, is very different than trying to become an avid Bible reader. Though both take discipline, one involves action whereas the other involves perceived inaction. Let’s take our health as an example. What do you think is easier, exercising or eating less? Exercising is the good that we proactively do for our bodies. It takes action and effort to go to the gym, run a few miles, lift weights or do sit ups for an hour or so a day. But it only requires inaction to avoid eating when you aren’t hungry or when you want junk food. The perception is that we simply don’t partake. Likewise, to read the Bible daily may demand time, energy, planning and effort. Whereas, avoiding pornography only requires the perceived inaction of doing nothing. We simply don’t partake right? To those who may not understand, the act of “doing nothing” may sound incredibly easy. But it is only perceived inaction. If they have ever tried to go on a diet and deny themselves some of their favorite foods, they may begin to understand. Avoiding pornography requires more than simple inaction. As with dieting, it requires planning, effort, conviction, and a certain level of pain. However, I would argue that avoiding pornography, to some, may be more difficult than dieting because it comes with one more hurdle. It is a hurdle that if not taken seriously could sabotage all our efforts. As such, this entire book comes with a warning. The warning is, that whenever we, as humans, try to take steps toward Christ, Satan is motivated to throw a wrench in our program. He is real and he does not want to see you succeed. He does not want you to find freedom from his hold and he will take steps to stop you. So, I encourage you to be on guard. His efforts may reveal themselves in many ways; by giving you greater opportunity to sin with pornography, by distracting you from your goal of freedom, by leading members of the opposite sex to become more sexually suggestive or flirty with you, or any number of tactics. Who knows what tool he may use? But remember the carrot and the stick. He could dangle something you want in front of you to throw you off track, or he may introduce something negative to intercept your efforts. So, begin preparing now, and as you’ll see later in this book, ask the Lord for additional protection as you commit. 1 Peter, chapter 5, verse 8 reminds us:
Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.
Please do not take this warning lightly. Do not allow yourself to be the devil’s next meal. His efforts are no joke! If you are aware of his tactics, you will know them when you see them. In my experience, the best defense is prayer and discernment with a dash of common sense.